,,Sometimes life gets you [[down->"Deep-oPression".]].
As we grow, some of us learn to deal with [[dissapointment->"down-Err..um".]],
or adverse circumstance. Some cope (click-replace:"cope")[ fake it] better than others.
The phrase nature or [[nurture->"dis not that advantage".]]
is casually applied to explain away trauma, the physical (click:"physical")[ , psychological, (click:"psychological")[ existential.]]
We don't want to be labelled, like a bottle of cheap off-brand condiment. We must 'cut he mustard'. We are not a generic. We are an individual, (click:"individual")[we are all an individual, a lone] (click-replace:"a lone")[divided and lonely.]
The way we were nutured is supposed to have a large impact on how we [[reacte->"EMOTIONS!"]].
How we cope with the stress of unexpected hurdles.
We might jump(click: "jump")[ leap], fleet with fortitude, seemingly care free.
Taking the knocks full on.
But that same sucker punch can send us right down to suicidal void from which we never get up from.
What makes the difference?
Does it take //THE// right person, saying //THE// right thing, at //THE// right time?
Or is it biochemical?
Cortisol stress hormone released in utero could lead to more abnormal development than a cleft palate. So can we blame our parents from before our aural cavities were able to be eroded by "what a disapointment we are to them."
Guilt can lead to [[anger->"...dispair comes in 80bpm...".]].Accidents can change one's whole trajectory.
Our own or [[others->"BEloved".]].
[[Imflammation->"Autonomic nervousness".]] of the brain in childhood suffered through meningococcal infection can make some unwell, but then, it can also lead to other more lasting brain changes.
Headaches that turn into imbalances. Some which make us stumble over a side walk, or the stare from a stranger sending us over the edge.
We could sink into [[doldrums->"...dispair comes in 80bpm...".]], while away our life.
But, (click: "But")[ where there's life there ...[is]...](click: "is")[[hope->",hope".]]Loss can be hard to deal with.
[[Loss->"Deep-oPression".]] of a relationship that [[props->"Succubus".]] us up, or seemingly gives status.
Though [['hazardess'->"Props".]] relationships can be linked with substance.
Sometimes they will go together.
People we can only stand the company of when we are drunk.
Or a person who we watch destroying themselves with their addiction.
When do we back away?
If we stick around are we complicit, watching the self harm?
(enchant: "Lightbulb", d'))(text-colour: yellow) + (text-style:'bol |Lightbulb>[Lightbulb] gotta want to change(click: "change")[ or get switched on] right?... (click:"right")[''WRONG'']Various psychological ailments have been linked to imflammatory proteins [[cytokines->"SpecialK is not for breakfast".]] being overproduced as an immune response. This immune response has been linked to the experience of depressive states, or psychotic breaks with reality.
Imflammatory situations can get overwhelming, we might want to calm and soothe, but somehow end up in a flame war. What happens between the thought
and talk.
Agonising hours on WebMD (click-replace:"WebMD")[ astrology] how to solve our unprescribed (click-replace:"prescribed")[substantiated] [[symptoms->"Deep-oPression".]]"Ketamine works like a flash mob, temporarily taking over a certain chemical “receptor.” In some cases and with expert medical care, that can be a good thing. But cross that line, and it’s big trouble...When misused, ketamine can change your sense of sight and sound. You can have hallucinations and feel out of touch with your surroundings -- and even from yourself. It can make it hard to speak or move, and it’s been abused as a date-rape drug."1 (click:"1")[
(1) Collins, Sonya.
Reviewed by Melinda Ratini, DO, MS on February 27, 2018
https://www.webmd.com/depression/features/what-does-ketamine-do-your-brain]
Sounds like a lot of hard work when we are already suffering (click:"suffering")[, from the oppressive feeling of the banal and mundane reality of existance.]
Throughout our history we have been[[searching->"Trips, falls, and arrivals".]]Violent or emotionally [[toxic->"Props".]] relationships can become a pattern, a [[cylce->"Succubus".]]. Hard to escape, (link:"can feel futile.")[ freedom is an illusion]
Observers can find it hard understand.
"Why don't you just leave?" Says an unsimpythetic society. Seeing 'victim' as 'perpetuator'.(click-replace:"per")[petrator]
Being caught sometimes isn't down to choice, [[but->"dis not that advantage".]]...
Opiates: (click: "Opiates")[ Evaporate your pain, ride the happy train to derailment.]
Psilocybins: (click: "Psilocybins")[ burrowing into the bowels of the earth, rooted and writhing, bilious belch, back up to the surface.]
Cannabinoid: (click: "Cannabinoid") [ Freaking groovy, paranoid schitzoid freak out.]
Methamphetamines: (click: "Methamphetamines")[Mr 'UNIVERSE'.]
Or raging(click: "raging")[ at strangers on the streets, and staggering into heartless darkness.](click: "darkness")[ The rampage receding,into wretchedness]
[[Misery->"Deep-oPression".]]
The return of the weary voyager. With the grail of transformation (click-replace:"transformation")[ la aqua vita]. Drink it in.
Feeling replenished (click:"replenished")[ and rejuvinated.]
Embibe the collective memory of green (click-replace:"green")[ silver flecked, fish soaked seas.] We follow and read the stars, they have stories that guide us and bind us, through our ancetral narrative. It's our inherant character (click-replace:"herant character")[heraitance.]
Anointed burst from our amniotic sac, plumped with nutrients enriched, ready for the plunge. (click-replace:"plunge")[return.]
[Slipping into the shallows, salty licks lapping our wounds, carresed by playful waves, warmed by the sun of our bouyant youth.]
We can lie our head down now, Hypnos has arrived,(click:"Hypnos")[ with heavy lidded sleep,] away we drift.
We are children, returning safe and sandy from the seaside, extra hungry (click:"hungry")[ for fish and chips, that never tasted better than after digging for days to fill up all the beaches with moats and castles.]. Sated finally, we can taste anew..
The sweetness of the air that billows you out, flushes our check.
Kissed by the catharsis of knowing, these feelings too will
[[end.->"down-Err..um".]]Where have you gone? Whisper, softly now...(click:"Whisper")[ Hope is a delicate thing]
A desperate scene, a pursuit.
The pleading lover.
(click-replace: "lover")[ Please come back.]
(click-replace: "Please come back.")[ Pitiful](t8n-time:5s)+(link:"Pitiful")[Have pity.]
Sometimes out of humilation (click-replace:"humilation")[ humility, the](click:"the")[ longing replaced] (click-replace:"replaced")[ stage of grieving subsides, we are free (click-replace:"free")[ exaltant, come on!][[escape.->"Trips, falls, and arrivals".]]]
Hiding under the bed clothes, binge watching, eating.
Getting [[drunk->"Props".]] so we can move from greiving quicker.
Maybe get angry, feel that energy of frenzied hate.
All the drugs have a payment day, the seratonin supply and the dealer don't do tick.
Moments of exhalaration, feeling ''TEN FOOT TALL AND BULLET-PROOF'', to the inevitable [[crash!->"Deep-oPression".]]
Mania can feel like progress, the sisyphusean torment, only to feel crushed on the way down, again, (click: "down")[ "hello, my fated and familiar friend..."](click: "hello")[ "you're cute when you're angry, love that fragrance, as the heat engulfs us, let me burn with you"...]
Exhaustion; (click: "Exhaustion")[ we are squeezed, where to find the eluvial [[sprite as it slips down stream.->",hope".]]]